To understand reality is not the same as to know about outward events. It is to perceive the essential nature of things. The best-informed man is not necessarily the wisest. Indeed there is a danger that precisely in the multiplicity of his knowledge he will lose sight of what is essential. But on the other hand, knowledge of an apparently trivial detail quite often makes it possible to see into the depth of things. And so the wise man will seek to acquire the best possible knowledge about events, but always without becoming dependent upon this knowledge. To recognize the significant in the factual is wisdom. Dietrich Bonhoeffer:


Life is a train of moods like a string of beads; and as we pass through them they prove to be many colored lenses, which paint the world their own hue, and each shows us only what lies in its own focus.---RALPH WALDO EMERSON
Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.---ABRAHAM LINCOLN
There is neither happiness nor misery in the world; there is only the comparison of one state to another, nothing more. He who has felt the deepest grief is best able to experience supreme happiness. We must have felt what it is to die, that we may appreciate the enjoyments of life.---ALEXANDRE DUMAS
“It is not because the truth is too difficult to see that we make mistakes... we make mistakes because the easiest and most comfortable course for us is to seek insight where it accords with our emotions - especially selfish ones" --- Alexander Solzhenitsyn quotes (Russian novelist, Nobel Prize for Literature (1970), b.1918)
“Wisdom ceases to be wisdom when it becomes too proud to weep, too grave to laugh, and too selfish to seek other than itself.” ---Kahlil Gibran

Friday, May 28, 2010

Childless Mother2

We just have our final exams for summer class and usually it is indeed an eventful time. I'm thankful that lots of students have done well and  I do really appreciate their efforts for the test.

I had this solid group of interior design  students, they were so united and apparently doing their job well, they had this impressive camaraderie though yes, some were not really part of the  group.

I have noticed this one student, Aphiwat. He was such a very  respectful student, yet a bit loner. He came to class late and seems couldn't  share the laughs the class had. I just thought he was the serious type and I could understand he didn't belong to the same section which he was studying with for summer class.

I was a bit surprised seeing him getting into my room with his shirt removed during the finals. He just had his white t-shirt showing his tattoos on his arms. He looked differently from a shy and timid gentleman to maybe a bit of a gangster. It was over time when he came in and I thought he was prepared for the exam later he just told me he wasn't ready.

I encouraged him not to worry about and just took the test as we're running out of time as the next batch of students were waiting outside.

I then started asking him questions and he kept saying "Ha??".  It's normal for some Thais to say that when they can't hear some words you say though it may appear very differently in my country, it could be rude. Anyway, I just repeated the question calmly and waited for his answers.

Later, he showed me an envelope with multiple hospital receipts as he was speaking Thai. I told him I didn't understand anything he said until he did the action and told me "teacher, the doctor said I'm crazy".

That was it, he was trying to explain that he's just been to the hospital. He was told he had a mental problem and had to take some medicines. He got so worried and restless, I counted he bumped into the chairs in the classroom for over  five times.

I felt my heart break, in an instant, I told myself, he didn't deserve what he was having. He was too kind and young to have the problem and  I felt so concerned about him.  I went through  with my other classes for exams nevertheless, and  later he went back peeping through my door.  I asked why, he told he left something.

I gave his stuff and again he bumped into the chairs which made some other students laughed at him.

I felt heavy after that, I just felt sad. And after the class, I saw his things right on the bench outside my room. They were his memory cards, ID, ATM. and some other documents.

I pity  him but I had no idea where he was, I got his things and submitted them to the English office and explained that the student left those.

I can imagine the other  discomfort the loss may offer and I feel sorry for him, really. I just hope that he can have his recovery the soonest and he can for sure finish school.  I can  mind the expenses the parents have for their student's education and it is not well to have anyone's child ending up mentally ill.

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